If you want to be single at Christmas, don't rush to confess! Expert advice: Thinking about "3 things" first is far better than shooting at random
The end of the year coincides with large-scale events such as Christmas and New Year’s Eve, and young people are often looking forward to dating their significant other or the person they like. In the warm holiday atmosphere, many people expect their love or friendship to heat up; however, while enjoying romance, you still need to pay attention to protecting yourself! According to data from the Taiwan Ministry of Health and Welfare, there were 3,998 reported cases of sexual assault among teenagers aged 12-18 in 2022, of which 1,422 (approximately 35.6%) were male and female friends, and 728 (approximately 18.2%) were ex-sexuals. Boy-girlfriend relationship.
If you want to be single at Christmas, don’t rush to confess! Expert advice: Thinking about “3 things” is far better than shooting at random
Taiwan Health Promotion Administration pointed out that common scenes in idol dramas include “If you/you fall in love with me, you/you should understand with the same look or expression!”, “How can he/she even think about me after we have been dating for so long?” Don’t know anything. “Couples need more detailed communication methods because they recognize each other’s relationship or care about each other. Even if they are intimate, they can be more authentic through each other’s voices, tone, expressions, body movements and words. Understand each other’s thoughts, feelings, and values.
In order to help teenagers establish healthy interpersonal communication and dating concepts, the Taiwan Ministry of Health and Welfare, Health Promotion Administration provides 3 tips for dating communication for couples, so that teenagers can enjoy romance and be happy and safe in an environment with beautiful lighting and a good atmosphere. Spend the Christmas season, gradually add points to your love or friendship, and create a better future.
Self-awareness
For effective communication between lovers, self-awareness is necessary; usually couples tend to show the better side of themselves and hide parts of themselves intentionally or unintentionally. Therefore, it is recommended to communicate more and get along more so that the other party will not misunderstand due to misunderstandings in communication. For example, you can think about: How do I want to spend Christmas? Where do I want to live? If the other party asks for further intimacy, how should I politely refuse a confession or refuse a sexual invitation?
Use empathy
Use empathy to think about the other party’s possible responses and emotions, and what kind of communication words will make the other party feel more comfortable and acceptable. For example: use communication skills: “I message”, starting with “I”, based on personal true feelings Start by adding factual narratives to express your expectations or feelings so that the other party can better understand your thoughts.
In addition, we must also avoid misinterpretations or inappropriate expectations during the process, such as mistakenly believing that the other person’s emotions and behaviors are related to me, and mistakenly believing that the other person can definitely know my thoughts just by looking at me.
Appropriate expression
When you need to express your thoughts, you should choose a time and space where both parties can focus more on each other, clearly use your voice, expressions and body movements to express your true opinions and feelings face to face, and listen to the other party’s responses and questions in a timely manner. In addition, the use of text or stickers for expression through chat software may create gaps in cognition or semantic interpretation, causing more disillusionment or misunderstandings, and may also indirectly become barriers to communication.
6 types of “dating landmines” that you should never step into during the ambiguous period, as they may turn the other person off directly.
In addition to following the above three major points, if you want to be the perfect partner in the eyes of the opposite sex, you must first avoid becoming a “destroyer” in an ambiguous relationship. According to a study published in the journal “Personality and Individual Differences”, there are six types of personalities that disgust the opposite sex: vulgar behavior/disgusting appearance, being too obsessed with feelings, being dependent on the other person, having a chaotic private life, being cold and unmotivated, and are most likely to destroy the relationship with the opposite sex. Relationship.
Zsofia Csajbok, the author of the study, believes that taking into account the openness of sexual concepts and the different views on love among young people, the “landmine personality” between men and women regarding investment in relationships has also changed with the times. For example, people with more open sexual concepts (mostly men) tend to maintain lower standards for their partners; people who believe that their spouses have higher value are more likely to refuse to invest in relationships, and the correlation is stronger among women than among men.
Even so, Csajbok said that the six personalities in the above study cannot be used as the only criteria for choosing a mate, and the sample size of this study is still insufficient. More subjects need to be included to clarify the relationship between personality and relationship destroyers. sex. “In general, if you can avoid the above six types of personality, and respect each other enough and treat each other well, it will indeed be helpful to become an ideal partner.”
Are people with “4 traits” more attractive? Experts reveal that “good looks” are not the primary condition
Do you want to get out of singles on Valentine’s Day and date the person you’ve longed for? But just looking good isn’t enough to win their heart? In a modern society that values appearance, good looks are often considered attractive. However, research published in “Sage Journals” points out that people with “four major traits” have a higher chance of successfully attracting the opposite sex and are more likely to attract the opposite sex. Opportunity to become a “perfect partner”; good looks may not have an absolute advantage.
The team from the University of Cyprus and Nicosia pointed out that for an individual to become a “more attractive partner”, the following four conditions must be met, namely good character (such as kindness, reliability); resource provision ability (such as intelligence, wealth) ; Reproductive capacity, and the possibility of future development (for example, both parties have common goals and want to raise children or start a business together, etc.).
“Males or women with the above four traits are more attractive than others. These groups will have a greater mating success rate. They do have a reproductive advantage compared to unattractive groups.” Nicosia The university team believes that even if the above characteristics are lacking, it is still important to be more honest, thoughtful, enthusiastic and positive. These qualities are the fastest possible way to make the other party take off their guard.
Source:
3 Tips for a Christmas Date Using “I-Message” Communication Skills
Six “red flags” in relationships: From being dangerous to gross and being apathetic to unmotivated
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