Good to read like a book! Study: The more confident people are, the happier they are
Have you ever encountered a situation: your partner was obviously submissive before the relationship, and every move was full of the model of a gentleman/lady, but after the relationship, his personality changed drastically, as if he was not the same person before the relationship. ? How to judge whether a partner is worth dating based on the first impression? Research from McGill University in Canada believes that dating with others is actually like “reading a book”. The more understandable and consistent you are, the more likely you are to be accepted by the other person. As for how to tell whether the other person is “easy to read”, it depends on whether the other person’s words and deeds are “confident”.
How to check whether the object is the same as it appears? Having “self-confidence” is the key
The research team invited 372 subjects to participate in dating events held in Montreal, Canada in 2017 and 2018. Before doing so, subjects were asked to complete a questionnaire assessing their personality and well-being. Relatives, friends, or family members of the subjects also completed a questionnaire about the subject’s personality. The subjects then went on several three-minute dates; after each interaction, they were rated on the date’s personality.
The experiment showed that most subjects did understand the personality of their date, but the researchers found that some dates were more “read through” than others. Lauren, PhD in Psychology from McGill University. Gachard. Lauren Gazzard Kerr said that if we use books as a metaphor, some people are easy to read while others are difficult to understand. This study found that those dates who are “easy to read” will have more happiness. , subjects with higher self-confidence and life satisfaction tended to make dating easier and simpler.
Why do people who are confident in their words and deeds and easily satisfied always make a particularly good first impression on others? Research believes that these people can face themselves more truly and have the courage to accept mistakes; such a personality will also make the other person feel a greater sense of happiness, thus making the date smoother. So, can we judge a person’s personality based on first impressions alone? Research says yes, as long as your date shows confidence and a sense of happiness in life in their behavior, it’s usually not too far off from their personality.
Avoid falling into the cycle of “self-doubt” and remember the “8-Point Principle” in daily life
Of course, not everyone can show confidence in front of strangers. Some people will “self-doubt” when faced with compliments, feeling that they are not as good as the other person says. This behavior of doubting oneself is called “imposter syndrome” in medicine. Patients suffering from imposter syndrome will often fall into “perfection”. ism" or “excessive modesty” mentality.
Psychiatrist Dr. Yang Congcai believes that excessive pursuit of perfection can actually lead to exhaustion and a sense of powerlessness in not knowing why you are working hard; therefore, patients with impostor syndrome should first adjust their mentality to “accept” and “get used to” praise, and reward them in a timely manner. Your own efforts can help patients build self-confidence. In addition, sharing your feelings with relatives and friends from time to time can reduce your uncertainty about yourself, which will also be of great help in improving your self-confidence.
Finally, Dr. Yang Congcai believes that patients with imposter syndrome should try their best to adhere to the “8-point rule” in life. Practice to achieve 8 points in everything, and leave a little flexibility for the remaining 2 points depending on the situation, which can make you more comfortable and also This leaves room for future progress.
Based on the above, is the first impression others give you important? In fact, as long as you build up your self-confidence first, your words and deeds will be natural and will not be too different from your true personality; even if your appearance may indeed affect the way others see you, at least maintain your confidence and sense of certainty when dating, and you don’t have to worry too much. Don’t worry about other people’s eyes, and don’t worry about the other person’s first impression, which will make the date end in failure.
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